Ssssssseeya!

I know you were hoping for another story about my horrible/blessed life. But I am just saying that I will be gone for a week. (Or longer if I REALLY like it there.)

Seeya laterz!

Some of my best friends are Squirrels.

(this post is currently unfinished, but close enough that I have published it)

I am heading to Canada next week, and I am pretty excited.

Why?

The creation of this alias, Expavesco, is thanks to the most horrid game in the world... of Warcraft. Yes, World of Wacraft (WoW).

While some people were restless for their 2005 thanksgiving festivities, I was busy 'Leveling up' my Warlock supreme. I played this game almost non-stop for 2 years. (spare time, non-stop...)

I am excited for a week from now, when I get to drive up to Canada to be with my internetz friendzorz, Teh Squirrel Legion. I r Loves them so many.'

The Squirrel Legion is a 'Guild' that I joined inside the game. (About 100 people) we ran around killing monsters and finding super-duper treasure. Most of the people who play live in the Mountain Standard time zone, so there are guildmemebers from Arizona, all the way to Canada, as well as the rest of the northern Americas.

I, being hilarious, became an emeritus leader of the group. I would entertain the guild often with hymns and primary songs. Everybody LOVES to hear popcorn popping on the apricot tree. How do I put this, I was kind of a big deal. :)

Not really.



Now I don't play WoW anymore, because believe it or not it became more like a job than a game. There were schedules involved and people who would be upset if you didn't get on to play the game with them. Serious business. :/

(Example: Listen to this group[clip includes swearing, nsfw] fighting a big monster, and the leader gets mad at somebody because they make a mistake that causes them to lose the fight. "That is BS... What just happened? Tom! You just wiped us (made us lose) and wasted money (Pretend money) I can't have you in the group.")

Anyway, it wasn't fun.

However, I am amazingly cool, and there must be a bunch of other amazing people like me playing this game right? Yes! there are, and have I mentioned that I am going up to Canada next week to get together with them IRL. Also I am excited.

Last year a lot of us went to Seattle and it was a blast.
We all tried really hard to just talk about normal things, but it eventually (after 20 minutes) broke down into talking about video games and Warcraft. Such loosers! :D

With all the time we all spent playing this game together and talking most of us really have become good friends.

Hmm... What else to say...
If you have a friend who is playing World of Warcraft now, please... help them to stop.

(That is the short version of the story, the long version includes a lot of jargon that only warcraft players should understand, for a lot of it only applies to this pretend world.)

For they who find me creepy

My Dad, I sure do love him. He is always trying to help me out. Why just the other day we brought me a special treat. "Look here son," was the beginning of this exact quote, "I brought you a special treat! It is a phone number... from a girl!"

Now I know I am 'teh sex' and everything, but this is pretty amazing. I can get girls phone numbers without even leaving the house! Without the INTERNETS!

Since the punchline never came I had to ask, "Are you serious?"
"Yeah!"
"Where did you get the number? How?" I said to the guy.

Turns out there is a girl who is going to his ward who he decided was 'perfect' for me.
When I asked him what the joke was and what was wrong with her he said, "She's a babe, shes smart, and she is willing to go out with you."

I don't know... but the whole thing seems really weird. He gave me her number and said I should call her. (Which I haven't)

Monday (a day later) he called me up to tell me when she would be getting off of work and it would be a great time for a 'meet and greet'. I told him that a meet and greet sounds like it would have more people than 2 which would make it less awkward than walking up to her after work "Hey. I knew you would be here, my dad has told me so much about you!"

Well, I had plans so it didn't matter.

Today he comes home and he has his digital camera. Guess who went to her work and took pictures of her. Guess again. Right, it was my dad. (not secret photos from the bushes. He just walked up to her and snapped... I think 7-8 shots.)

As he showed them to me, I just tried to express for bizarre and creepy what he had done was, but he is in some sort of other world and refuses to listen to reason.

Now I have to call her... and it is going to be weird.
I don't imagine it being quirky or cute, I feel like it is going to be the most awkward meeting with any female I have ever suffered in my entire life, bar none.

I am dreading it.

If I wasn't me, I could just play it off as "oh, thats my dad.. teehee"
But I am expecting something more along the lines of "Hi... so... hi."
Her, "Can you ask your dad to leave me alone please?"


For the record, she is cute I think, I am having trouble separating her image in my mind from the horror of... why did you do that dad?

Music is a treat

I love music, and I love to listen to it very loud.
That is why I love my job. It is laid back enough that I can listen to my ipod all day (or youtube videos, if I really get bored.)
I get to go back and listen to all the music that I missed out on over the 8 years that I only listened to They Might Be Giants, Enya, and Movie Soundtracks. (I still love this music, sans TMBG, which I really overdid... I just can't listen to them again.)

A lot of them are tied to great memories... ah, good times...

But anyway, I get to listen to a lot of different music now.
Thanks to a few of my friends who happen to have lots of music for me to... borrow? or burgle... either way, thanks to them for filling my mp3 player with gigs of good stuff.

When I was carpooling with my friend Brandon, we would listen to one of the 2500+ selected by random and rate it 1-5 stars (1 star meaning delete that one when I get home, 2... it can stay but it is on thin ice... and so on)

Good times were had when horrible songs would play. On the other hand Forgotten Gems and new great songs were also found. A lot of stuff that I didn't like before sounded a lot different, or maybe I just understood better what they were trying to say.

There are a couple of bands that helped me get out of the musical rut I was stuck in. The Strokes and Death Cab For Cutie are a couple of the new bands that I have enjoyed most, and let me realize that I should give every band a couple chances, at least.

(Thanks Transformers)

Also, Guitar Hero has reminded me of some of the popular hits, and also brought about that great phrase that will live on forever, "Hey, that black guy is playing the song from Guitar Hero!" :(



I started linking a bunch of videos, and remembered that everybody knows how to find them on youtube... So go find them. (But here is one, in case you forgot)
Emery

I guess that is all I was going to say. Give all the different types of music a chance.
Maybe even Snoop Dogg.

Rainy days and mondays...

Every morning before I leave for work, I step out of the garage and take in the morning's wonderful atmosphere. Yesterday I was greeting by a neighborhood jogger.
"Hey, did you just move in?" (OH no... They think the house has been abandoned this whole time. I can't really blame her, the lawn is destroyed and we aren't really socialites)
No, we have been living here about 8 years now. *Courtesy Laugh*

It is raining today... Can life get any better? I submit that is can not.
Well, I guess it could be better. There could be lightning and thunder.

I remember last year when we went to Seattle (Belleview?) that it was lightly raining when we were walking around, and it was THE BEST. It hasn't rained in Utah for weeks if not months. We all commented on how much we wish it were like that all the time.

Today is like that day, driving down the freeway with the windows down, the air is warm and the raindrops are cool. I am completely relaxed.

Sunday was great too, went out later to take some dusk/night pictures. The Camera was broken so it wouldn't take really dark pictures. So instead I just drove up the canyon and back. Since the day was the hot hot heat the night time canyon breezes were pleasantly warm. There wasn't much traffic so the entire drive was quite leisurely.
...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
here comes the sun, what a way to ruin the day.

Do Right, Son. Do Right.

Here goes either a long rant or a short, soon to be deleted, rant-let.
(Well, I didn't delete this yet, so... reader beware)

I remember now. I hate parties. I guess if it were just people that I was already friends with then it would be fine, but there are always people that I don't know... and somehow I end up being either alone with them, or we will be the only two people not busy with 'stuff'.

And so it was tonight. Sitting there with Sarah, which I met 5 minutes ago, and nothing in common to talk about. I didn't really want to talk to her anyway, so I really only felt awkward for her sake. Luckily she mentioned something about her boyfriend on his mission in Brazil. Nice, I got to share my intimate knowledge of Coconuts and Brazilian drunks with her, which is a more fascinating subject than it sounds. Ok, probably not... But it is a lot better then sitting there avoiding eye contact and pretending to be busy and content while doing nothing.

After the 90 minute mark my awkward quota was fulfilled so I could actually talk to her without feeling I was just being polite. It doesn't seem to matter who it is, but if I haven't been around them for a good hour or so I can't act 'normal'.

I think it is even worse with girls, and five times worse if I am considering any possibility of a future with them. (I guess that is kind of weird for me to categorize every girl I meet into 'date-able' 'befriendable' and 'her? I hope she's funny' ...[I guess I also have the 'Oh wow, this person is so very stupid... please... I hope they are distracted by some lights so I can escape swiftly' category])

So, Once discovering she is all waity-wait for her beloved missionary to return in a few months I can really be normal around her, since I don't have to hold back to avoid the appearance of flirting.
(Heads up: nothing is going to happen in case anybody was getting their hopes up, its not that kind of story. It is more like a trick I am playing on you to continue reading)

Sarah told me that she couldn't believe that I wasn't married yet, A common compliment for me (Thanks mom)and only less common than:
Sarah:'Oh, you smell good'
Me:'What?! I smell ...delicious?'
Sarah:'No, you know, I just thought you were one of those people who stinks'
Me:'... ... Thanks ... Why do people keep saying that?'

(Yes... I have heard that more than twice. Almost exactly that same conversation.)
(And for the record, I smell both good AND delicious).


Anyway, She asks me about where I went to school and where I live and then if I know John Doe from the 'Silver mountain crest 214th singles ward' or something like that, to which the obvious answer is no. "No because you don't go to church that often, haha?"
This is when I had to decide if I am going to avoid the question, or just kill the conversation with the truth... I kind of like the truth, which is why I choose that one... a lot.

(Warning: if you are of the type who has been warned not to talk to people who don't agree with everything having to do with the LDS religion I would prefer if you stop reading here. End of the story is we talked at this party, and I am pretty sure we are friends if I ever see her again [not likely] But here is where I will discuss my beliefs, which I guess might be offensive to a 'true believer')

"I don't go to church anymore."
"oh." *This was when I think I could hear crickets*
"If it is not too personal, why not?"
I could have explained it a lot better than I did, but it is hard to remember how to express how things work in my head.
"I don't believe its true anymore." I said, which is true I guess, if I take in EVERYTHING about the church and give my own pass/fail grade, but it is 'false' doesn't really sum up what I think about EVERYTHING in the church. I immediately regret my choice of words. again.

What I really think is a lot more complex than that but it is kind of hard to talk about without bringing up all the little things that don't really matter.

It sounds kind of cocky, but I really think the church isn't a good place for me, and I can be a better person on my own (As in not a part of an organized religion).
I know what is right and wrong for the most part, and for the rest I can figure it out myself. God has given me the tools to make righteous choices for myself, and I can always ask for help when I need it.

I don't feel good when I am at church, and if I don't feel good I can't really grow while I am there.

So the principles and a lot of the beliefs that I learned from the church are still true to me, but there are some things I don't agree with and I don't want to rationalize them so that I can attend meetings without being ashamed of the way things are done in what is supposed to be the perfect church. (I am aware that people aren't perfect, but there are real problems with both the people of the church and the organization itself, I believe.)

Someday there will be enough corrections to the church that I won't be ashamed of myself to be a part of it, and I hope that day comes sooner than later. (For Clarification, I think being LDS is probably the religion that has the most to be proud of as far as its principles go.)

Anyway... that is the better answer than "I don't believe its true anymore."
I guess it might have been better to say, "I am trying to follow the teachings of Jesus Christ, it's just that I am trying to do it without an organized religion instructing me."
It still sounds kind of cocky, a person thinking they know better than a group of people.

Also, I guess this is a pretty heavy topic for somebody I just met... but she asked so... yeah. (I apologize to anybody who had to read this that didn't want to go down this road with the twisted words and attempts to plant seeds of disbelief. That isn't my intention, and hopefully that won't affect too many people... since so few will see this blog, let alone read the entire article.)

She seemed to be ok with that answer, and seemed like she kind of understood, but like I said I kind of gave the 'interpret this however you want' answer.

Moving back to the 'I can't believe you aren't married yet' conversation Sarah said I could move out of Utah, and I would have a very different experience with the church (which I don't doubt, but not the experience I am really expecting from a high end 100% true church... because that would be some kind of Christmas miracle.)

"I don't really know if I could date a Mormon girl with long term marital expectations, I don't want to be the one who crushed her temple marriage dreams. Unless it was 'true love', in which cases I would be willing to crush and squash those dreams the second she asked me to." (I don't think I could really do that to anybodies dreams though, because I would never live it down to her or myself... or her mom, best friends, extended family, and everybody who would ask her which temple she is getting married in. I don't want to be the cause of that never-ending doubt.)

She laughed, "That makes it almost impossible for you to get married here."

"Yeah, that and I don't really get out much."

(Things will work out, they always do. And being a bachelor is only bad in Utah.)

Why now?

So I actually want to write, and I have something to write aboot... but I am exhausted and I actually have work to do for once... So I will save it for later when I have forgotten what I was going to say. Just know this...

It makes me sad that I have to be the family peace keeper again, for I thought we had all moved past our angrysauces.